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不一样的爸爸,我是山姆影评

这部电影讲的是一个智商只有七岁的爸爸在一次意外情况下失去了自己女儿的抚养权,他在世人的偏见下靠着朋友和律师的支持争夺回自己的抚养权的故事 也许是因为自身没有经历过这种直直白白的父爱,所以很多幕场景都牵动着我的心 在Sam下了班急着去看自己刚出生的女儿时,他数着电梯到达的每一层 他和Lucy被他收留的女人抛弃了 他抱着孩子在街边的无奈 one way的路牌 却暗示着这他们父女俩的无处可去 他想给女儿买双鞋 但是却缺了10多美元 于是他的朋友(和他一样也是弱智)就一起凑钱 售货员的眼睛里都充满泪水 最后他们还单纯的为能拿到气球开心 Sam的律师Rita由原先的不情愿为Sam当律师到被Sam感动 努力帮助Sam争取抚养权 影片中多次拍摄 那种身为父亲可是因为自己对事物的理解力不够,不能用语言表达自己的无奈,那种无奈的眼神 看的本宝宝真是 看到一次就哗哗的落泪 影片中Sam因经历了一次又一次的失败,给自己建立了一面可以算是看了都觉得marvelous的纸墙 他说 I tried,I tried hard! But you don’t know what it’s like when you try and you try and you try and you don’t ever get there. Because you were born perfect, and I was born like this! And people like you don’t know, you don’t know what it’s like to get hurted , because you don’t have feelings. People like you don’t feel anything. 那般的歇斯底里 真的不是用我苍白的语言能描述的 结局是总是好的 以最后Lucy球赛的胜利来暗示Sam争夺到抚养权的胜利

本片讲述的是一个智障爸爸于福利机构争夺女儿的抚养权的故事,过程很坎坷很虐心,结局当然是美好的,小孩的演技真是太好了,长的灰常漂亮,而且不是一般可爱。
片中一群智障一块凑钱给Lucy买鞋然后一起拿着气球排排过马路的情节真是好有爱啊。一个智障,其实比大部分家长更懂得如何去爱自己的小孩,Lucy其实就是男主的全部,他花尽所有心思来呵护她,对Lucy倾注了全身心的爱。跟小孩相处,要的是用心,跟智力无关。父亲对女儿的爱,永不止息。
Lucy说爸爸Different,和其他爸爸不一样,确实,既是智障,同时又能带给很多爸爸不能给女儿的东西,仅仅只是不同而已。
男主在律师家时好好地教育了律师一番:You’re so lucky.You get to play with Willy any time you want.He doesn’t want to play with me.Yes,he does.Yes,he does.He does.He thinks you don’t want to play,maybe.That’s ridiculous.Of course I do.为人父母,很多很都不知道如何做好一个好父亲,好母亲,在这部片子中,我们能得到很好的答案。小孩不会不喜欢你,只是你觉着他不喜欢你,你表现出你尊重他,你爱他,你喜欢和他一起玩,他就会离不开你,其实你才是他们心中最坚实的依靠。男主的真诚深深打动了律师,在他换上西装时,甚至深深被他的魅力迷住了!
Lucy被带走时,电影近乎是无声的,台词全都没显示出来,浓浓地渲染了离别的凄凉,律师在旁边都没感动的哭了。男主近乎崩溃,一个人游走在黑夜的大街上。之后有一次偷偷去看过Lucy,却不敢见她。然后就是一个人默默地把自己关在屋里,谁都不理会,陷入了自闭。Yeah,but I tried! I tried hard! You don’t know what it’s like when you try...and you try and you try and you don’t ever get there! Because you were born perfect,and I was born like this! People like you don’t know what it’s like to get hurted...because yo don’t have feelings.任何人,在极度受挫的情况下,都会把情绪宣泄给别人,怨天尤人,抱怨身边所有的不公,这时,他需要有人拉他一把!
最后律师说:I worry that I’ve gotten more out of this relationship than you.其实在他们相处的过程中,律师确实帮助了男主很多,而律师从他那也学会了很多。每个人,都可以成为别人的老师,在这段关系中,律师从男主身上学到了很多她一直没有想明白的,却是很简单的事。有时,我们忙于各种思考,却忘了很多时候,我们只需要作出一个最简单的决定。
总之,这部片子就是感动自己,感动他人,治愈系电影。

Now I can see those kind eyes.

本文摘自一个名人们写给女儿信的网站,这篇作者Angela是Burberry的前CEO和Apple零售高级副总裁(Senior Vice President for Retail at Apple),她讲了最重要的四个人生建议给女儿,并且字里行间都透露出浓浓的爱,暖哭。
  今天讲课的是John,好开心,John是公共号“清晨朗读会”的作者,人超级棒!并且,中文说的那叫一个666.

Sam:Yeah, but I tried! I tried hard!
Rita:Try harder!
Sam:Yeah, but you don't know!
You don't know what it's like when you try and you try and you try and you don't ever get there!
Because you were born perfect, and I was born like this! And you're perfect!
Rita:Is that right?
Sam:You don't know what it's like to get hurted.. because you don't have feelings. People like you don't feel anything.
Rita:You think you got the market cornered on human suffering?
Let me tell you something about people like me.
People like me feel lost and little and ugly.. and dispensable.
People like me have husbands..screwing someone else far more perfect than me.
People like me have sons who hate them.
And I've screamed horrible things to him..a seven-year-old, because he doesn't want..to get in the car at the end of the day.
And then he looks at me with such anger..and i hate him then.
I know I'm failing you. I know I'm disappointing you. I know you deserver better, but get in the fucking car!
Every morning, I wake up and i fail. And I look around, and everybody seems to be pulling it off..but somehow I can't..no matter how hard I try.
Somehow..I'll never be enough.
Sam:You're enough. Yeah, you're much more than enough.Lovely Rita.

讲到一些知识点:
  • lead by example以身作则
  • 演讲の奥义(步骤):
    1.Tell them what you're going to tell them.→2.Tell them.→3.Tell them what you've told them.
Everybody behave Like a gentleman..because Lucy's gonna come out
here..and first impressions are very important.  
Lucy:You never even came! You never called! You forgot about me! How
coule you forget me?  
Sam:No, I didn't forget you! I would never forget you! -I hate you!  
Sam:Will you not be mad at me for one second? Because I want to tell you
one thing, OK?  
"P.s. I love you, like in the song"

SUGGESTION Ⅰ:always be present

I have always tried to be present for you regardless of how old you were, where we were, or where I was. I wanted you to know that I am always there for you spiritually, emotionally and digitally. You never need feel** isolated** or alone. You know I am on 24/7 for advice, love, or just to share a funny filtered photo, bitmoji or laugh (even though I know I laugh inside).
 Being fully present, by listening, feeling, empathizing—always holding serious eye contact, and often the touch of a hand—builds trust. Trust builds confidence and confidence enables you to look forward, dream more and focus on others vs. yourself. Being present is the greatest gift you can give another person, and the greatest way to more closely connect with them. When you are present, you are living in the moment vs in your mind. You are seeing, hearing, and feeling another person, and together you are even more empowered to do great things. This is a gift that often comes more naturally to women.

  • navigate ['nævɪgeɪt]驾驶:~your incredible life journey.
  • isolated ['aɪsəleɪtɪd]隔离的
  • filter过滤v.镜n.['fɪltə]
  • empathize同理心['empəθaɪz]

_be present就是于专注于当下的意思,比如你虽然在聊天,但脑子在走神,这就不是be present。我觉得很对,作者说和人交往时,一定要be present,看着她的眼睛,全身心的投入去听和感受对方,这样你就会得到信任与亲近。
  ∴行动:永远处在当下,尤其与人交谈。自己和别人聊天就会犯这样的错误,心不在焉,这样怎么能使别人信服于你呢!
_

Sam:But you still need to leave your husband.
Rita: My marriage isn't so bad.
It't just that..I've never lost at anything.

SUGGESTION Ⅱ:read the signs

I have also tried to share with you as many of life's precious lessons and secrets as I can so that when I am not here, you have a solid foundation of learnings and values regardless of what potholes in life you may hit along the way. Stay open; always try to read the signs as you pass by them or they pass by you. I've often reminded you that there are no coincidences. Everything that happens in your life is for a reason or was predestined. Every book you receive, every new person you meet, everything you call lucky is a sign just waiting to be read. It is** tough** when you are young and so** inward-focused, but once in a while you will look back, make the connection and then be more open to and curious about those signs in the future. You see, signs aren't blatant or obvious. You have to be open and present to instinctively feel them. You are blessed as sensitive** women to more naturally understand this.

  • solid foundation ['sɒlɪd]固体的,坚固的基础
  • potholes ['pɒthəʊl]坑
  • along the way一路上
  • coincidence[kəʊ'ɪnsɪd(ə)ns]巧合
  • tough[tʌf]艰苦的
  • inward['ɪnwəd]内向的
  • curious['kjʊərɪəs] obvious['ɒbvɪəs]
  • blatant['bleɪt(ə)nt]喧嚣的
  • instinctively[in'stiŋktivli]本能的
  • sensitive['sensɪtɪv]敏感的

*  直译就是阅读标志,她有一点命运的感觉在,认为生活没有偶然,你读的每一本书,遇见的每一个人,所经历的一切,都是注定的。所以你要足够open,curious,sensitive去寻找命运给你的提示sign。
  很有意思,不管从佛教还是科学角度命中注定很有道理的:佛教是更偏向前世的业障的因素,科学解释我认为就是你的生存环境会决定你的认知,你的认知会决定你的选择,选择决定你的行为,于是你所做的一切都是差不多可以预估的。所以和诺你认为是偶然的事情其实必然会发生,比如....好倒霉为什么试卷上这些题我都不会.....因为这都是注定的啊,有因必有果。
  ∴行动:永远保持开放,好奇的心态去经历各种,保持敏感/敏锐的感知去发现事物的联系!这很重要!and,不抱怨。*

It's number nine. And number nine is like October 9..when John Lennon
was born and his son was born on October 9, too.  
John met Yoko on November 9. Yeah, and his mother lived..at number nine
Newcastle in Liverpool.  
Newcastle, nine letters. Liverpool, nine letters.

SUGGESTION Ⅲ:stay in your lane

You are fully aware of how blessed you are, the incredible gifts you were born with that your brother doesn't have and the gifts he has that you don't possess. You know how happy you feel when you are doing what you love and that comes so easily and naturally to you. So please, please, please connect to your passion, and then just stay in your lane. Great athletes, musicians, scientists, etc., all have anexpertise that they focus on and perfect.
 Don't let anyone persuade you to do anything that doesn't feel natural or isn't aligned with your values or God-given gifts. You know what excites you more than anyone else. The sooner you recognize your passions, and the more you focus, the happier you will be and the greater success you will achieve. Still, don’t worry if you don’t know exactly what your lane is yet. The path will illuminate itself so long as you stay present, open to the signs, and follow your passions. It’s all related.

  • be aware of意识到[ə'weə]
  • possess拥有[pə'zes]
  • stay in your lane车道[leɪn]
  • excite刺激[ɪk'saɪt; ek-]
  • etc.[ɪt'setərə, et-]
  • expertise专长[,ekspɜː'tiːz]
  • persuade说服[pə'sweɪd]
  • illuminate照亮[ɪ'l(j)uːmɪneɪt]

*  这个可以一句话搞定:坚持做自己。喜欢自己的天分,喜好,并且坚持下去。永远走在自己的路上。让别人....。不过最后作者也说,即使没找到自己的路也不要担心,只要你专注当下,(open the sign)开放观点?,跟随内心,就一定会炸到属于自己的路。
  ∴行动:别焦虑(虽然现在很焦虑),干好手头事,静下心,就可以看到自己的本心。*

Sometimes if you rub her belly..and then if you tell her two stories..and give her half an IHOP corn muffin..then sometimes she sleeps.

SUGGESTION Ⅳ:never back up more than you have to

Lastly, my loves, never back up more than you need to, and this means in life, not just when driving. Just as you are blind to what's behind you while backing up a car, if you keep looking back in life and focusing too much on the past, you may find yourself running things over and over in your mind, often seeing or creating things that never existed in the first place. Even worse, living in reverse blinds you to what lies ahead: Your lifelong dreams waiting to be achieved, your destiny waiting to be fulfilled.

*  这个也是一句话嘛,别老想过去。我最近很有体会。晚睡,是因为白天碌碌无为而羞愧不舍睡去,于是我就劝自己:事情已经发生了,你要再这样,明天也没了!于是我就去睡了。哈哈,很好用哦*


以上就是今天英语的学习成果,这段时间没有认真学习,每天想的都是玩,一点也沉不下心。并且到现在为止还没有开始写作。或许这可以作为一个契机,每天英语和写作合在一起,也算一个监督。
   祝愿每一个想成为better me 的人都可以成为better me!
共勉~
我要立flag了,必须!今天是周日,从下周一开始,我要先坚持七天,一周!!!!!!这周一定会做到七天,没问题。

~~~
I have to apologize to you..Sam because I was gonna tell that judge..that I could give Lucy the kind of love she never had.
Sam:I hope you're saying what I think you're saying.
 I think you're the red in her painting.

爱一个人想和她在一起却不善表达
爱一个人想和她在一起却遇到阻碍
我尝试了,我努力的去尝试了。
应该更努力!
但有时努力了,发现所给的,她并不幸福。
醒悟了自己让她失望,感觉貌似不晚,其实已经慢慢无力。
而所能做的就应该去争取去尝试,努力的,更努力的去尝试。
爱是选择,双向的选择。
不放弃希望。因为你知道,你爱他就像他爱你一样。

“好父母需要始终如一,需要耐心,需要聆听,即使听不进也要假装听。”

Rita: Now, Ms. Cossell, in all the time that you've known them, have you ever questioned Sam's ability as a father?
  Annie: Never.
  Rita: Never?
  Annie: Never. Look at Lucy. She's strong. She displays true empathy for people, all kinds of people. I know that you all think she's as smart as she is despite him, but it's because of him.
  Rita: So what you're saying is you don't worry about Lucy's future?
  Annie: No, I do.
  Rita: Ah...
  Annie: I worry all the time. I worry if they take Lucy away from her father they will take away an enormous piece of her, and I worry that she will spend the rest of her life trying to fill that hole.

~

Sam: OK, remember when Paul McCartney wrote the song "Michelle" and then he only wrote the first part, Annie said. And then he gave that part to John Lennon, and he wrote the part that said, "I love you, I love you, I love you." And Annie said that it wouldn't have been the same song without that... and that's why the whole world cried when the Beatles broke up on April 10, 1970.

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